Alpha Beto

A new, white stallion has just entered the presidential race and is already galloping past his rivals in the dash for campaign cash.

Texas Democrat Robert “Beto” O’Rourke announced this week that “Team Beto” pulled in over $6.1 million in online donations in the first day of his newly minted presidential run. The eye popping haul outpaces warhorse Democratic Socialist Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont who stunned political watchers with his $5.9 million one day take.

The former three term congressman who lost to Senator Ted Cruz in 2018 while amassing a record breaking $80 million war chest boasts that “in just 24 hours” he has proven that “it is possible to run a true grassroots campaign for president.”

O’Rourke is also proving that, despite his thin resume and their professed obsession with “diversity,” Democrats still swoon over Kennedy hair, family money, and youthful, white male swagger.

One female veteran of the 2016 Hillary Clinton campaign complains to The Hill newspaper that the toothy, 46 year old, skateboarding, former punk rocker typifies “the tyranny of the bro culture.”

Another Democratic campaign strategist warns that O’Rourke is “going to have to show he’s a candidate for this particular moment and so far I can’t say he’s passed the test.”

Last week, in the 24 hours following O’Rourke’s presidential announcement, one media watchdog clocked 52 instances of talking heads on CNN slamming the boarding school alumnus for being white and male.

Former Obama presidential adviser David Axelrod notes that, like Sanders who is known as “Bernie,” “Beto” has achieved the “rarified status” of becoming a single name candidate — a status arguably more powerful than “white male privilege.” Just ask Obama.



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